Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Edgar Allan Poe-ish

So, for just about the entire time I've been with my fella, he has slept with an oscillating fan next to the bed. I hate it. First of all, I have a medical condition that makes me very cold at times...especially at night. It takes no chilly wind to prompt teeth-chattering and shivering for me. I even have an electric blanket, which I'm fairly sure is the best purchase I've ever made in my life. So I truly believed having that fan shooting cool air toward me all night was some form of torture.

The other thing about this fan is that the wooossshhhhing sound of the air blowing and the fan moving back and forth is something I've never had to deal with before. I should probably pause here to tell you that I'm something of an insomniac. For this reason, I've never really been able to sleep with music playing or background noise, because it makes it even harder for my already racing thoughts to just SHUT UP already. So night after night after night, I have put up with this frigid wind machine sending me into near freezing states and driving my fragile mind further and further toward the edge.

The night before last, the big guy's fan finally died. Completely gone, no chance at being repaired. With half a smile on my face, I settled in to get some sleep. It was very peaceful; completely quiet and the air was still. In fact, it was a little too still. I looked around the room, a little on edge because I had realized that the air was not moving AT. ALL. The A/C was on but even with that, the air in the room felt heavy, like it was hanging above me and ready to drop down at any moment and smother me. Weird, right?

Then I noticed something else. It was eerily, strangely quiet in the room. Every noise felt like it was amplified in the silence. A leg stretching out across the sheet, a cricket in the back yard, my dog Cooper getting a drink of water in the kitchen...as I huddled under my blanket, I was assaulted by an arsenal of sounds that shot through my brain and made it impossible to go to sleep. Not to mention the thick, hanging air that would surely pounce down on me like a wet, smothering quilt the moment my eyes drifted shut.

Flinging the blanket off, I rolled and turned to try and get comfortable. Was it a little too hot in the room? The A/C was set at the normal temperature. *Crickets* Fluffing the pillow, I tried to shut off my mind. *Water being lapped up by doggy tongue* Maybe I needed a drink too. *Thick, evil air waiting to fall on top of me and smother me in my sleep* Rolling to the other side seeking comfort. Swearing I could hear the very molecules within the bed shifting to accommodate my new position. On and on this went, driving me absolutely and totally insane.


Yesterday, the big guy brought a new fan home. *Eye roll* Great. Now I was sure I'd freeze and be driven insane by the whirring of the motor. But guess what - last night, I slept perfectly! No thick, hanging air waited to kill me and I couldn't hear the neighbors mumbling in their sleep. Thank GOD for that fan!


  1. LOL! I LOVED this! So very EAP-ish! Great post! And as for sleeping with a fan, I used to be like you... couldn't sleep with ANY noise in the room. Then I had kids and we used a moving fish lamp as a night light for the room we all slept in. Now I sleep with a fan on at night. I need the noise, too.

    Here's to many more peaceful nights of sleep! Cheers!

  2. Cute. I didn't see that ending coming at all! I love writing with a twist. I love the unexpected ending. Though I write mostly about my journey with MS ( multiple sclerosis) I'd like to think it is a tenth of the quality found here!